Enya, and other random thoughts

Ok, I'm not as emotional as yesterday...but I'm feeling very much alone and out of place still. Some of this will go away when I start school tomorrow because I won't have so much time to think, but the feeling will remain, deep inside, as it always does. I might try to convince myself it's not there...

...but I wouldn't be successful in the least. If anything, pretending my desire to be in a place I call home again was nonexistent might only worsen matters. I can only hope that I get a job at the teaching fair I'm going to in June, since it'll knock off a good semester or more of my schooling...and it'll get me certified to teach special education. Granted, if I decided to jump states and go back home to Memphis, I might have to take a teaching test to have certification in that state, but I wouldn't foresee that as a problem.

I have to admit, this time coming back to Florida was harder than it ever has been before. I'm tired of this loneliness and of the pretense that everything is just peachy-keen here. I feel like I'm in a downward tail-spin, and I'm not quite sure what will help aside from getting the heck out of Florida.

Now, to totally change the subject to a somewhat less dim note, it seems like I was missed at work. My kids have being going nuts on the substitues and the girl that works as my assistant. I think my assistant takes the children out of the room too often and leaves them out too often after removal. There is something to be said about the fact that it is summer and we have almost all boys. These kids don't want to be in a classroom...

...and quite frankly, right now, neither do I. Man, I need to get into the school system. For my sanity's sake, for the possibility of getting out of Florida sooner...

...and on an even shallower note, so I can get summer's off already.

And, as if I haven't already stated it enough, Kate, I miss you like hell. And we are the champions, right? :)

and BTW, these lyrics to Only Time by Enya pretty much sum up how I'm feeling about now:

Who can say where the road goes,
Where the day flows?
Only time...

And who can say if your love grows,
As your heart chose?
Only time...

Who can say why your heart sighs,
As your love flies?
Only time...

And who can say why your heart cries,
When your love dies?
Only time...

Who can say when the roads meet,
That love might be,
In your heart.

And who can say when the day sleeps,
If the night keeps all your heart?
Night keeps all your heart...

Who can say if your love grows,
As your heart chose?
Only time...

And who can say where the road goes,
Where the day flows?
Only time...

Who knows?
Only time...

Who knows?
Only time...